I was talking to a friend recently and they elucidated the difference between inner game and self esteem. The basic conclusion was that self esteem, inner game and outer game are distinct. This would tie into Tyler's concepts of situational confidence vs. self esteem. Inner game would be your overall belief in your competencies with women. Outer game would be the execution of the competencies. Self esteem is the way you feel about your own self worth as a person, outside of women. Much of the old community was about outer game techniques. On this understanding it could indeed build your inner game with women but you could still have very low self esteem. How this would translate would be a guy who felt like shit as a person yet was confident in their abilities to pickup women. With the natural game trend in the community we now see guys turning towards and focusing on self esteem. To me this holds it's own pitfalls. I know I fell prey to this for a long time whilst only practicing RSD type of game. From my experience, on this paradigm, you end up really enjoying your nights and the girls may even be attracted to you and quickly due to you obviously being a happy and carefree guy. My outcome dependence was way down when doing things like this however because there was no focus on outer game or in other words getting from A to B then I would always end up with nothing, or a quick makeout and a date with lady palm. So with that in mind I'd suggest a mix of both learning outer game tactics but also working on your self esteem- which would be all the RSD stuff. Converse to how people label it as 'inner game' upon my conversation with my friend I would say it is indeed not inner game, but rather self esteem which RSD teaches. I suppose they also teach some mindsets stuff however feeling good about your conpetencies with women when you don't actually have those competencies (i.e. are shit at outer game) is crap. What RSD always fails to mention is that all of those guys got good using routine based game which is just a form of extreme outer game, before suddenly saying you don't require outer game. So they are trying to put the cart before the horse with there 'forget outer game' campaign. I would suggest a hearty mix of all 3. So to conclude I would say- Self esteem is the sum of all your inner game proficiencies- if you have failed at most things in life then you will likely feel like a loser. If you have succeeded or otherwise have self belief, (or do not require rationalizations of why you are a success -i.e are a zen monk who does not depend on any external validation -actually that would probably be having NO self esteem but let's not get into that here!), you have high self esteem. Inner game is your confidence in your specific competencies. Outer game is the specific behavioural tactics to gain competency in a given field. So I'd recommend working on all 3 for overall success.
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I was talking to a friend recently and they elucidated the difference between inner game and self esteem. The basic conclusion was that self esteem, inner game and outer game are distinct.
I've spent the last 7 years or so of my life learning the game and good pickup lines and am now sharing my knowledge of How-to-talk-to-girls-properly.
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