While all seem well-intentioned, these particular books can steer you wrong. Here are a few of the worst relationship advice books I've ever read, and why they made the top (I mean bottom) four. 1. Why Men Won't Commit - Getting What You Both Want Without Playing Games by George Weinberg, Ph.D. This book should be titled, 'How to Give A Man What He Needs In A Relationship So That He Can String You Along Forever." The author states that men don't commit to women because they are afraid of "losing their masculinity". On that point, we probably agree. However, I believe it is a sad day when marriage is considered a "loss of masculinity". Just two generations ago, marriage was THE right of passage from boyhood to manhood. It was with great honor and pride that men took on the responsibility of a wife and heirs. But it was also the primary means for a man to begin having appropriate sexual relations. Unfortunately, that is no longer true. The author encourages women to "maximize the early relationship sparks" by having sex "when it feels right" so that a man will want to marry you. He also strongly suggests that your man will resent you for "making him wait too long" for sex. Hogwash!! Ladies, these are ridiculous and threatening insinuendos meant to intimidate women! This is a book written by a self-admitted commitment-phobe who believes men should have unlimited free sex without commitment. Skip this book, unless you are needing further proof that too many men have an attitude of smug self-entitlement regarding premarital sex. 2. Make Every Man Want You - How to Be So Irresistible You'll Barely Keep From Dating Yourself! by Marie Forleo No, no, no!! And did I say, NO?! This book is filled with terrible and self-contradictory advice. There are a few obvious good tips, such as "don't be needy and insecure", but most of of the book, in my opinion, is either feel-good pop psychology or downright WRONG! The book starts out by suggesting that all women are inherently irresistible and perfect just the way we are, if we will simply believe that fact. Then she suggests that we stop kidding ourselves, work out more, dress sexier and learn to strip tease for a man. Ridiculous! She does not suggest waiting to have sex with a man. She only suggests women be honest with themselves about their reasons for having sex with a man. She also suggests you not have any preconceived notions about men, otherwise you will never have true love. I think that is a recipe for naivete and heartbreak. 3. He's Just Not That Into You - The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo A funny and well written book. Plus the overall advice is good... if a guy is not calling you and not asking you out, stop making excuses! He's not that into you. Get over it and move on! But then the authors go on to say that if a guy is not having sex with you, he's not that into you. I hope what the authors meant to say is, "if a guy is not INTERESTED in having sex with you, he's not that into you." The authors fail to acknowledge the fact that if you've already slept with a guy and he's not calling you and asking you out again, it's usually because he's already HAD sex with you and he's moving on to the next easy lay or to find a girl who is marriage material. Another extremely disturbing tidbit is located at in the frequently asked questions section. The male author says he believes marriage is just a "relationship tied to a legal document". In other words, if your husband is not that into you, dump him. 4. If You Want Closure In Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs by Big Boom My hopes were high for this book, based upon the title. But I couldn't have been more disappointed! It was a poorly written mish-mash of contradictory ramblings. The author calls himself "Boom, the bodyguard for women's hearts". A former pimp, player and hustler who wants to show women his evil past in order to protect them from men like him. But it comes off a bit more like bragging. Like many of the other books, it has some redeeming moments, like one on page 147 when he writes, "it's easier to get money and commitment from a man who you haven't had sex with than to get it from a man who you had sex with." But later he practically mandates premarital sex by stating, "it is through good sex that a man starts to open his heart, allowing him to experience feelings that help him determine if the woman has more substance and staying power." But the worst thing about the book is it's blunt sexism. Here are a few of my favorites: If a woman sleeps with a man the first night, she should "try not to wake up in the morning looking crazy. It's too early in the morning and in the relationship for him to see you looking a mess." Regarding child support, the author tells women to "stop trying to be greedy" and that God will find a way to take care of her and her children. Regarding shoes, he believes women should not walk around without high heels on in front of a date. He says, "she usually has no idea how bad her butt looks after taking her shoes off. Her butt drops and is not up in the air anymore. Now the man is looking at the woman thinking, 'What happened to the butt.'" Ugh! To find some more helpful relationship books, visit my website.
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After reading dozens of relationship advice books, I have come across the good, the bad and the downright ugly. Here are four of the worst...
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